Tag Archives: Mark

In Sickness & In Health

wedding

So, Mark and I are celebrating our 23rd anniversary today. Just shy of 3 weeks after his physical catastrophe.

I’m not an overly emotional or sentimental person but I clearly remember my voice cracking only once during our vows…”in sickness and in health”. In an instant, I was overwhelmed by the thought of him being sick and vulnerable.

He’s had some minor surgeries (that dual hernia operation just before our 10th anniversary wasn’t too fun) but nothing as challenging as this.

The thing is, as challenging as this is physically, emotionally and probably financially, I know it isn’t even close to the worst that can happen to a couple. Not even close.

So I’m thankful that we work well together because just about everything he does, we do together. I’m thankful that we enjoy each other’s company (as long as he doesn’t try to tell jokes). I’m thankful that we trust each other to get through this. And yes, I’m thankful that we love and trust each other and even on our worst days, there still isn’t anyone I would rather spend time with (no offense to my children, who come second in that category).

I don’t feel all that much different than that day 23 years ago. Marrying Mark felt like the rightest, most natural thing. Helping him do just about everything feels just as right and natural (though, I have to keep reminding him the kids can fetch the this or the that when they’re here).

Happy Anniversary. Oh and Happy Birthday to Luke who was our 5th anniversary gift!

How a Mammogram Made my Day…It’s not what you think.

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How a mammogram made my day

Source: Abdulsalam Haykal on Flickr

I went to a mammogram appointment this week and had the sweetest experience…(NOT THE MAMMOGRAM). The fact that it was a mammogram is only important as it relates to what I noticed about a couple who came in at about the same time as I did.

An older couple parked at the same time as me and we ended up in the same office. The woman was using a walker but seemed too young to be using it. Also, she seemed pretty steady on her feet. Maybe early seventies. Her husband looked a little older. Both of them were smartly dressed. She moved so well with the walker that I was thinking maybe she was recovering from an accident.

They checked in (he did the talking) and the man directed his wife to a waiting room chair. He told her he would be waiting out in the lobby just outside the suite. She was fine with that. Before he left he quietly conferred with the receptionist and she assured him that she would “remind the technicians”. Within a minute or so, the man came back in and sat next to his wife and told her he decided he’d rather wait with her. “Thank you very much,” she said.

Next the man pulled out the magazine section of the paper and handed it to her because he thought she would enjoy it. “Thank you”, she replied to his thoughtful gesture.

In the next area where you change and wait again, (why it made sense to disclose that we were there for mammograms) the attendant showed the woman to a changing stall then quickly adjusted her strategy and said the technician would help her with the robe.

I could be wrong but my brief observation of this couple indicated that the woman suffered from some form of dementia and the husband was her caregiver, protector and advocate. He was so patient, sweet and thoughtful of her needs. The measures he took to inform the staff discreetly that she required extra assistance seemed so loving and tender as though his primary concern was preserving her dignity.

Not only was it touching, it made me think of Mark (my husband). He’s always as kind and gentle with me as the man was with his wife (though, often I don’t deserve it). Should I require care in our older years, I have no doubt that Mark will be as patient as the man was with his wife.

Thinking of that made me smile out loud.